Chakara,Auntie Bernie & Talice (cousin)
"What's the matter Princess? Don't you want to spend the day with Auntie Bernie?"
These questions were asked by me to my niece ChaKara who had just been dropped off to spend the day with me. She shook her head yes she did but still looked sad. After a little prodding two big fat tears fell down her cheeks so of course I was even more convinced she didn't want to spend the day with me. Finally after much coaxing she said through her tears, "I don't want to do any work." Her mother had left instructions with me that she had to complete some extra work in homework books.
Before I realized, I said to her, "That's okay Princess, you don't have to do any work."
"Oops! what did I just say???"
It is so easy to think that no matter what we will always do the right thing but sometimes we fail dismally. I speak to teens in my church and community often about not making choices just because they want someone to like them. However, here I was, wanting my niece to have a fun day with me without tears so I made the wrong choice. While this may seem small that's how bad choices often start. One choice to do the wrong thing makes it easier next time.
Unfortunately for me, I'll probably have a more difficult time with my niece who when she visits me again will probably not expect to do any school work. Fortunately, I now have a ready answer, "Let's sit down and do it now Princess, then we have the rest of the day to relax and have fun." Hopefully, it'll work.
June 1, 2010 I published the last issue (at least for a while) of Girl Talk my teen girl magazine. Since this blog was originally designed for the purpose of publishing weekly devotions for the magazine and later the magazine itself I decided to create another blog that isn’t connected to Girl Talk.
I’ll probably still publish book reviews or other items here now and again but you’ll more often find me at Trusting Him with Today. I hope you’ll stop by
I’ll probably still publish book reviews or other items here now and again but you’ll more often find me at Trusting Him with Today. I hope you’ll stop by
Apr 15, 2007
Apr 12, 2007
Suggestions for entering the job market
School days, school days, good old golden rule days….
In a few months for some of you life as you know it will be over. You will be saying goodbye to your old alma mater (high school) and moving on to the next phase in your life. For some of you it will be college and for others it will be to enter the work force. Whatever it is you do after graduation it’s going to require you to make life changes, to grow up if you will. There’s going to be hundreds of you graduating in June and the reality is that the majority of you will in all likelihood be looking for a job and the job market is a stiff competition.
My question for you to consider is, “How are you going to distinguish yourself from the rest of the pack when competing for a job? Not sure? Well here are just a few humble suggestions:
1. Fill out applications neatly and correctly. Be sure to fill in all areas asked for. Your prospective employers will get their first impression of you from your job application. Make it a good one.
2. Dress for success. When you’re out looking for a job your should always be neatly attired. Dress conservatively, no plunging necklines or super short, extra tight skirts or low rise pants. In other words, dress like the young lady you are.
3. Have a resume made up in case it’s requested. Don’t worry about not having enough to put in it. Include positive personal characteristics, computer skills, educational accomplishments, awards, part time work experience etc.
4. Keep at it. It may take a while to find a job but don’t get discouraged. There’s something out there that you can do.
5. Be courteous, speak properly, look people in the eyes, smile… it looks good on you.
6. Remember even if you have to work for a while that doesn’t mean you have to give up on your college dream. So while working, save or better still take a few courses on a part time basis. A good education can open more doors and give you more options.
In a few months for some of you life as you know it will be over. You will be saying goodbye to your old alma mater (high school) and moving on to the next phase in your life. For some of you it will be college and for others it will be to enter the work force. Whatever it is you do after graduation it’s going to require you to make life changes, to grow up if you will. There’s going to be hundreds of you graduating in June and the reality is that the majority of you will in all likelihood be looking for a job and the job market is a stiff competition.
My question for you to consider is, “How are you going to distinguish yourself from the rest of the pack when competing for a job? Not sure? Well here are just a few humble suggestions:
1. Fill out applications neatly and correctly. Be sure to fill in all areas asked for. Your prospective employers will get their first impression of you from your job application. Make it a good one.
2. Dress for success. When you’re out looking for a job your should always be neatly attired. Dress conservatively, no plunging necklines or super short, extra tight skirts or low rise pants. In other words, dress like the young lady you are.
3. Have a resume made up in case it’s requested. Don’t worry about not having enough to put in it. Include positive personal characteristics, computer skills, educational accomplishments, awards, part time work experience etc.
4. Keep at it. It may take a while to find a job but don’t get discouraged. There’s something out there that you can do.
5. Be courteous, speak properly, look people in the eyes, smile… it looks good on you.
6. Remember even if you have to work for a while that doesn’t mean you have to give up on your college dream. So while working, save or better still take a few courses on a part time basis. A good education can open more doors and give you more options.
Apr 10, 2007
Spotlight on Aldeka LaRoda
“ I find that the center of my prayer life remains my request to allow my life not only to please God but to be established to its fullest potential in Him…”
Aldeka LaRoda
Miss Aldeka LaRoda is a 2004 honours graduate of Bishop Michael Eldon High School. She graduated, as you can see from the above summary, with an impressive academic resume. Since graduating she is two years into her bachelors degree in biochemistry, at College of the Bahamas and plans to transfer to another university to finish her degree. She has been accepted into several colleges and offered scholarships but has not decided which offer to accept yet.
Aldeka was involved in the CSM while in high school and a year ago became a part of a group that goes into the public high schools to witness to students and assist them with their CSM clubs. According to Aldeka, God is doing a work in the lives of the students and she’s humbled to be a part of it.
What impressed me most about this young lady was when I asked about dreams and her plans for accomplishing them. Aldeka was able to paint me a verbal picture of her future as per a fifteen year plan she had written out when she was in eighth grade. Somehow I think this young lady who puts Christ at the center of her dreams will see them come to pass.
In Aldeka's own words
Who inspires you most in life and why?
It may sound mundane but my mother Mrs. Jennie-mae Laroda inspired me most in life. She inspired me in the way she lived- peaceably with even her worst enemies. Besides all of these qualities she inspired me most in the way that she died. To die with such dignity made me truly realize what an amazing person she was. She had the perfect opportunity to curse God and die but she smiled and I could hear it through her groans “Though he slay me yet will I trust him.” Her life quickens my own day by day.
What’s your favorite high school memory?
Lunchtime was the noteworthy moment of each day. Yes of course the learning part was and remains essential but socially, lunchtime chats with the fellas’ was the high point of my days. Politics, religion, war, economics, family roles, married life, death, music, you name it, it was discussed with such fluency one would believe we were undercover philosophers.
What do you miss most about high school?
I miss the security of high school knowing that if you didn’t do it right, someone would correct it for you. After High school that security blanket doesn’t exist anymore. Don’t get me wrong I love independence and responsibility but who really wants to give up the carefree life of childhood?
Is life after high school the way you expected it to be?
Life after high school honestly is not as terrifying as I expected. I learned that although you gain responsibility, over your own life there are still people there to help you along the way whether it’s to get your books, buying an old buggie for you to get around or giving you a pocket full of change so you don’t starve to death- there is help!
Is there anyone in your life you can always count on?
I can always count on the Holy Spirit not to let me down but second to him is my sister Chakita. She has been the greatest support to me, rarely has she let me down. What I love about my sister is that even though she gets on my nerves, when I need her she tries her best to be there. I owe her much of my life.
What are some pressures or disappointments that you have faced as a young lady?
I have always been pressured to change who I am so that I wouldn’t stand out. I am weird and I celebrate it once I am in no contradiction to the word of God, I love being me.
If you had to describe yourself with one word, what word would you choose? Why?
DIVERSE.I think that I’m like a diamond, not because of its beauty but because of its many facets. I’m strange by design and my gift is having a relatable spirit. I can sit and chat amongst 40 year olds about Plato and Chopin, to 16 year olds about relationships and teenage stress, 13 year olds about the last episode of Ned’s declassified or 3 year olds about the blue choo choo train on Dora the explorer. (What a great gift!)
Where do you want to be in five years? Are you on the right path to getting there?
I wasn’t promised tomorrow but in five years I would like to be 5 years wiser, 5 years stronger and 15 years closer to God. I also desire to complete my degrees in Biomedical research (BA MS PHD). Yes I most definitely am in the right place…God’s hands. Where He leads I will follow and who can mess up when Perfection is leading the way? Not even a fool so I’m assured that as long as I stay willing and obedient I will eat the good of the land.
If you think that you, or someone you know, would make a good Spotlight Teen do drop me a line. P.O. Box F-43929, Freeport Bahamas or email keepingitrealgirltalk@hotmail.com
Aldeka LaRoda
Miss Aldeka LaRoda is a 2004 honours graduate of Bishop Michael Eldon High School. She graduated, as you can see from the above summary, with an impressive academic resume. Since graduating she is two years into her bachelors degree in biochemistry, at College of the Bahamas and plans to transfer to another university to finish her degree. She has been accepted into several colleges and offered scholarships but has not decided which offer to accept yet.
Aldeka was involved in the CSM while in high school and a year ago became a part of a group that goes into the public high schools to witness to students and assist them with their CSM clubs. According to Aldeka, God is doing a work in the lives of the students and she’s humbled to be a part of it.
What impressed me most about this young lady was when I asked about dreams and her plans for accomplishing them. Aldeka was able to paint me a verbal picture of her future as per a fifteen year plan she had written out when she was in eighth grade. Somehow I think this young lady who puts Christ at the center of her dreams will see them come to pass.
In Aldeka's own words
Who inspires you most in life and why?
It may sound mundane but my mother Mrs. Jennie-mae Laroda inspired me most in life. She inspired me in the way she lived- peaceably with even her worst enemies. Besides all of these qualities she inspired me most in the way that she died. To die with such dignity made me truly realize what an amazing person she was. She had the perfect opportunity to curse God and die but she smiled and I could hear it through her groans “Though he slay me yet will I trust him.” Her life quickens my own day by day.
What’s your favorite high school memory?
Lunchtime was the noteworthy moment of each day. Yes of course the learning part was and remains essential but socially, lunchtime chats with the fellas’ was the high point of my days. Politics, religion, war, economics, family roles, married life, death, music, you name it, it was discussed with such fluency one would believe we were undercover philosophers.
What do you miss most about high school?
I miss the security of high school knowing that if you didn’t do it right, someone would correct it for you. After High school that security blanket doesn’t exist anymore. Don’t get me wrong I love independence and responsibility but who really wants to give up the carefree life of childhood?
Is life after high school the way you expected it to be?
Life after high school honestly is not as terrifying as I expected. I learned that although you gain responsibility, over your own life there are still people there to help you along the way whether it’s to get your books, buying an old buggie for you to get around or giving you a pocket full of change so you don’t starve to death- there is help!
Is there anyone in your life you can always count on?
I can always count on the Holy Spirit not to let me down but second to him is my sister Chakita. She has been the greatest support to me, rarely has she let me down. What I love about my sister is that even though she gets on my nerves, when I need her she tries her best to be there. I owe her much of my life.
What are some pressures or disappointments that you have faced as a young lady?
I have always been pressured to change who I am so that I wouldn’t stand out. I am weird and I celebrate it once I am in no contradiction to the word of God, I love being me.
If you had to describe yourself with one word, what word would you choose? Why?
DIVERSE.I think that I’m like a diamond, not because of its beauty but because of its many facets. I’m strange by design and my gift is having a relatable spirit. I can sit and chat amongst 40 year olds about Plato and Chopin, to 16 year olds about relationships and teenage stress, 13 year olds about the last episode of Ned’s declassified or 3 year olds about the blue choo choo train on Dora the explorer. (What a great gift!)
Where do you want to be in five years? Are you on the right path to getting there?
I wasn’t promised tomorrow but in five years I would like to be 5 years wiser, 5 years stronger and 15 years closer to God. I also desire to complete my degrees in Biomedical research (BA MS PHD). Yes I most definitely am in the right place…God’s hands. Where He leads I will follow and who can mess up when Perfection is leading the way? Not even a fool so I’m assured that as long as I stay willing and obedient I will eat the good of the land.
If you think that you, or someone you know, would make a good Spotlight Teen do drop me a line. P.O. Box F-43929, Freeport Bahamas or email keepingitrealgirltalk@hotmail.com
Apr 9, 2007
Words of Advice
By Jasemine K. Green
Keep your head up no matter what people think or say,
Because you’re living your life, step by step and day by day
Remembering that what people say is not your business,
Especially if they are not helping to fulfill your lifetime dreams or wishes
Even though it may seem real hard to, ignore them,
And let their negative words be discarded,
As the positive ones are regarded
Choose your friends wisely I say,
Through doing this you may live to see another day
You are known by the company you keep,
So choose where you will never have to weep
Keep your head up no matter what people think or say,
Because you’re living your life, step by step and day by day
Remembering that what people say is not your business,
Especially if they are not helping to fulfill your lifetime dreams or wishes
Even though it may seem real hard to, ignore them,
And let their negative words be discarded,
As the positive ones are regarded
Choose your friends wisely I say,
Through doing this you may live to see another day
You are known by the company you keep,
So choose where you will never have to weep
Apr 5, 2007
The Easter Story
Here's a story I think you should know
It happened a long, long time ago
So relax your mind and picture this
A rocky road lined with a joyful crowd
Shouting hosanna to the Son of God
He rode on a donkey, surrounded by those
Excited to be near the King of the Jews
They threw their cloaks, and branches from trees
They screamed 'til their voices were merely squeaks.
They entered Jerusalem with a triumphant shout
"Hosanna! Blessed is he who comes in the name of the Lord."
Now picture this a few days later,
Another procession but the mood's now somber...
As they followed the Savior to a place called Golgotha
They saw him nailed to a wooden cross
Between two thieves, one who mocked and scoffed
"You saved others now save yourself!"
On that wooden cross on Golgotha's hill
My Lord died for your sins and mine.
But hey now, let's not be sad!
Three days later he defeated death,
An empty tomb stands witness to this.
Two angels stood guard at the tomb on that day and said
"Jesus of Nazareth is not here, He's risen today!"
Not long after that the saga continued
Jesus ascended to heaven
Where he sits at the right of God's throne
But wait a minute now, the story's not finished
Jesus is in heaven now, but He's coming back again
The question is, are you ready for the big event?
Happy Easter everyone!
God bless
It happened a long, long time ago
So relax your mind and picture this
A rocky road lined with a joyful crowd
Shouting hosanna to the Son of God
He rode on a donkey, surrounded by those
Excited to be near the King of the Jews
They threw their cloaks, and branches from trees
They screamed 'til their voices were merely squeaks.
They entered Jerusalem with a triumphant shout
"Hosanna! Blessed is he who comes in the name of the Lord."
Now picture this a few days later,
Another procession but the mood's now somber...
As they followed the Savior to a place called Golgotha
They saw him nailed to a wooden cross
Between two thieves, one who mocked and scoffed
"You saved others now save yourself!"
On that wooden cross on Golgotha's hill
My Lord died for your sins and mine.
But hey now, let's not be sad!
Three days later he defeated death,
An empty tomb stands witness to this.
Two angels stood guard at the tomb on that day and said
"Jesus of Nazareth is not here, He's risen today!"
Not long after that the saga continued
Jesus ascended to heaven
Where he sits at the right of God's throne
But wait a minute now, the story's not finished
Jesus is in heaven now, but He's coming back again
The question is, are you ready for the big event?
Happy Easter everyone!
God bless
Apr 4, 2007
The Issue of Trust (from a mother's perspective)
By Cleora Williams
Why don’t my parents trust me, I haven’t done anything wrong?
As a parent, a mother in particular, as I reflect on the above topic, I can immediately think of several reasons why mothers sometimes, do not trust their daughters, even when they claim that they have done nothing wrong.
Uttermost in my mind is peer pressure: the need to impress, wanting to fit in. As mothers we watch you our daughters and we see your vulnerabilities: wanting to be like the other girls, we see it in the way you dress, in your speech and all the other mannerisms that we sometimes frown upon. We see the light in your eyes when a particular boy is near by. And, so we are concerned and we worry that you, our daughters will want to fit in or maybe you will want to impress but we hope that you will remember what you were taught.
Another reason we may hesitate to trust you is, your need or longing to do it “your way”. But as mothers where is the line drawn? When should we intervene? Should you, our daughters have to feel the fire in order to believe that it burns? Why not trust Mummy who may have been burnt a few times herself? So herein, lies a problem mothers wanting to hold on and guide their daughters, and daughters pulling away from mothers saying “why can’t you leave me alone, to live my life, don’t you trust me?”
And finally, another reason trust may be missing in a parent\child relationship is a child’s desire to experiment. I remember as a teenager, on the rare occasion when I was allowed to attend a school dance in my small settlement, I took full advantage of my temporary freedom. There were times that I found myself in situations that I knew if Mama could see me now I would be dead. When Mama would ask, “So how was the dance, what did you do?” I would casually say, “It was ok, I didn’t do anything”
So nowadays when we ask our daughters, “How was the party? or “How was Port Lucaya, what did you do?” and we get a shrug of the shoulders and the age old reply “It was ok, I didn’t do anything” our antennas immediately goes up. We know that our daughters are curious, also in most cases we know you (our daughters) would rather ask a friend or in many cases experiment and find out the hard way. So as your mothers we are afraid that you would get the incorrect information from a friend who is probably equally as curious as you and equally as uniformed. So when I hear it was ok, I didn’t do anything, I look again and ask are you sure?
They that trust in the Lord shall be as Mount Zion, which cannot be moved, but abideth forever”. Psalms 125:1
So, I say to you our daughters, trust in God, put Him first in all that you do. And to parents, mothers in particular, remember if you train up your daughter in the way she should go when she is old she will not depart from it.
Why don’t my parents trust me, I haven’t done anything wrong?
As a parent, a mother in particular, as I reflect on the above topic, I can immediately think of several reasons why mothers sometimes, do not trust their daughters, even when they claim that they have done nothing wrong.
Uttermost in my mind is peer pressure: the need to impress, wanting to fit in. As mothers we watch you our daughters and we see your vulnerabilities: wanting to be like the other girls, we see it in the way you dress, in your speech and all the other mannerisms that we sometimes frown upon. We see the light in your eyes when a particular boy is near by. And, so we are concerned and we worry that you, our daughters will want to fit in or maybe you will want to impress but we hope that you will remember what you were taught.
Another reason we may hesitate to trust you is, your need or longing to do it “your way”. But as mothers where is the line drawn? When should we intervene? Should you, our daughters have to feel the fire in order to believe that it burns? Why not trust Mummy who may have been burnt a few times herself? So herein, lies a problem mothers wanting to hold on and guide their daughters, and daughters pulling away from mothers saying “why can’t you leave me alone, to live my life, don’t you trust me?”
And finally, another reason trust may be missing in a parent\child relationship is a child’s desire to experiment. I remember as a teenager, on the rare occasion when I was allowed to attend a school dance in my small settlement, I took full advantage of my temporary freedom. There were times that I found myself in situations that I knew if Mama could see me now I would be dead. When Mama would ask, “So how was the dance, what did you do?” I would casually say, “It was ok, I didn’t do anything”
So nowadays when we ask our daughters, “How was the party? or “How was Port Lucaya, what did you do?” and we get a shrug of the shoulders and the age old reply “It was ok, I didn’t do anything” our antennas immediately goes up. We know that our daughters are curious, also in most cases we know you (our daughters) would rather ask a friend or in many cases experiment and find out the hard way. So as your mothers we are afraid that you would get the incorrect information from a friend who is probably equally as curious as you and equally as uniformed. So when I hear it was ok, I didn’t do anything, I look again and ask are you sure?
They that trust in the Lord shall be as Mount Zion, which cannot be moved, but abideth forever”. Psalms 125:1
So, I say to you our daughters, trust in God, put Him first in all that you do. And to parents, mothers in particular, remember if you train up your daughter in the way she should go when she is old she will not depart from it.
Apr 1, 2007
Slow down!
Crash!!! There it lay on the floor shattered. In spite of my best effort to catch my lovely little precious memory figurine that I had received as a gift it fell through my hand. In my rush to dust the shelf where it was I had knocked it over.
“Slow down” I whispered to myself as I looked sadly at the broken pieces at my feet. I felt upset with myself because I knew I could not put it back together again even if I tried. I also knew that it could have been avoided if I had simply slowed down and paid more attention to what I was doing.
Sometimes life itself seems to be a race to get from one stage to another. One of the ways many young ladies often rush their lives is getting involved in boyfriend/girlfriend relationships before time. This often leads to them becoming sexually active at a young age. Popular television shows, magazines, music, romance novels etc. seem to promote this “race” to grow up.
In the majority of the television shows for teens, most of the leading characters are involved in relationships where there is either a lot of making out, or actual sexual intercourse involved. In fact even the “family shows” seem to endorse this. On Seventh Heaven for example, one of the main characters sixteen-year old Ruthie Camden has a boyfriend whom she frequently makes out with and is battling with whether or not to go further.
Like Ruthie Camden, you may feel like being a teenager or being involved in a relationship makes you an adult but it doesn’t. You’re still a girl, an adolescent, a young woman… a relationship does not make you an adult. It is unfortunate, that a teen remaining sexually pure seems like such an old-fashioned view in today’s modern society. However this should not make you feel abnormal. Just because it seems as if everyone is doing it doesn’t make it right. God’s ultimate plan for sex is still within the bounds of marriage.
When you rush headlong into relationships you may find, your dreams shattered and your heart broken into tiny little pieces just like my precious memory figurine. But before that happens I’d like to say to you as a friend, an older sister if you will, slow down!!! The fact of the matter is this, if you live long enough there’s no exception, you will become an adult. Why rush? Enjoy this moment in time, I promise you life will not pass you by if you decide to simply slow down and enjoy being a teen without the drama of a grown up relationship.
“Slow down” I whispered to myself as I looked sadly at the broken pieces at my feet. I felt upset with myself because I knew I could not put it back together again even if I tried. I also knew that it could have been avoided if I had simply slowed down and paid more attention to what I was doing.
Sometimes life itself seems to be a race to get from one stage to another. One of the ways many young ladies often rush their lives is getting involved in boyfriend/girlfriend relationships before time. This often leads to them becoming sexually active at a young age. Popular television shows, magazines, music, romance novels etc. seem to promote this “race” to grow up.
In the majority of the television shows for teens, most of the leading characters are involved in relationships where there is either a lot of making out, or actual sexual intercourse involved. In fact even the “family shows” seem to endorse this. On Seventh Heaven for example, one of the main characters sixteen-year old Ruthie Camden has a boyfriend whom she frequently makes out with and is battling with whether or not to go further.
Like Ruthie Camden, you may feel like being a teenager or being involved in a relationship makes you an adult but it doesn’t. You’re still a girl, an adolescent, a young woman… a relationship does not make you an adult. It is unfortunate, that a teen remaining sexually pure seems like such an old-fashioned view in today’s modern society. However this should not make you feel abnormal. Just because it seems as if everyone is doing it doesn’t make it right. God’s ultimate plan for sex is still within the bounds of marriage.
When you rush headlong into relationships you may find, your dreams shattered and your heart broken into tiny little pieces just like my precious memory figurine. But before that happens I’d like to say to you as a friend, an older sister if you will, slow down!!! The fact of the matter is this, if you live long enough there’s no exception, you will become an adult. Why rush? Enjoy this moment in time, I promise you life will not pass you by if you decide to simply slow down and enjoy being a teen without the drama of a grown up relationship.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)