How do you get that lonely?

Have you ever felt alone in a room with all your friends? Ever felt like you're an extra piece of a puzzle that just doesn't fit in? I think most of us have felt this way at one time or the other. The question is do you talk to anyone when you do?

A few months ago, I listened to a song that I couldn't get out of my head. It was a song about a teenage boy who committed suicide. The song had a lot of questions. The singer wanted to know, Did his girlfriend break up with him, did he buy or steal that gun? Did he lose a fight with drugs or alcohol? Did his Mom and Daddy forget to say I love you son? Did no one see the writing on the wall?

However, there were no answers, for really is there any acceptable reason for deciding that life is not worth living? We all experience different emotions that if we let it, it can completely overwhelm us.

When you're dealing with difficult times, whether it's loneliness, depression, broken friendships or something else, remember although today may be bleak there's always the hope of a better tomorrow.

Tips for troubled times

1. Remember, you are not alone. Don't withdraw and shut yourself off from your family and friends. Talk to them, you'll discover that they've been there before and may be able to help you through it.

2. Have a good cry. Sometimes when you're going through something having a good cry helps you get rid of all the pent up feelings and when you finish crying you feel much better.

3. Don't dwell on your problems. Whatever is getting you upset and depressed will only get worse if you keep thinking about it. So after talking to someone about it let it go.

4. Watch what you listen to. if you are depressed and you listen to music that has a sad message then you'll feel worse. So lose yourself in some happy music and turn off that depressing stuff.

A part of the chorus of the song said: How do you get that lonely... and nobody knows? In all honesty it's easy to get overwhelmed by different things without anyone knowing if you choose not to talk to anyone. I remember being so depressed once that I thought for one moment, What if...? But, thankfully I thought beyond the moment to eternity. I talked to people I trusted and I prayed to God who is able to lift burdens that seem too heavy to bear.

We are all guilty of putting on a false smile and "fronting" as we Bahamians say, so the people around you may be fooled by that. Your family and friends have no idea what's going on inside your head if you choose not to share. Let someone in on what's going on with you. Sometimes in talking to other people we find out that maybe things aren't as bad as they first appear.


Girl Talk Magazine
Jun/Aug 05